“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” Maya A.

As women, we have been born with natural gifs. Of course, men were born with gifts as well. But for us, specifically, we have certain energy qualities in our possession that we can use and work with our nature. Those specific qualities belong to the feminine nature. Like we can attribute different qualities to day and to night without making one superior to the other. We can do the same with feminine and masculine. As a woman, I’m most interested in being able to use my natural powers to the highest of my ability. I’ve been obsessively reading and researching femininity for years. I found things that work. I found things that don’t. I found things that represent femininity expressed in the healthiest way possible. I also found what shows that feminine energy is being suppressed. So today, I want to share with you 5 signs that show for sure a suppression of the feminine energy flow. Once you’re aware of it – a half job is done. The other half is to decide to make some changes.

video on this topic

I often get inspired about ideas to talk about suddenly, in weirdest places like bathroom. Then I go and make a few bullet points. Finally, I make a free-flow unscripted video. The blog post comes after.

 So if you prefer watching rather than reading, you can do so here.

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1. You're closed off.

You don’t feel like you want or can allow any incoming energy. You have like a barrier to anything incoming that communicates “no”. This happens subconsciously or possibly habitually. Interestingly, “no” comes in before you know if the incoming energy may be good for you. It could be  that this is caused by childhood trauma, relationship trauma,

 your experience with adults in your life as a child, and other people later on. It could be that this is a protection mechanism to protect you from being indebted, strings attached, being manipulated or potentially losing your power. All of that is valid and does make sense, given what happened to you. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have these mechanisms on.

However, your feminine quality of

openness cannot express itself when you have this shield on. Feminine energy is receptive. Therefore, it is open. So if you’re closed off, you are also closing off this feminine quality.

2. You don't feel creative.

Creativity is a FUNDAMENTAL right of women! Yes, all people too, but especially women. It is not only a RIGHT. It is also a NECESSITY. Why I’m capitalising these words? Because it is super important for us – the women. When we cut ourselves from our creativity, we cut ourselves from our most essential resources. Our energy and our health depend on it! We need to be able to be creative in our lives.

And yes – it can come in many different forms. It can be cooking, it can be writing, it can be arranging flowers. It can be how you schedule your time. It can be how you arrange things in your wardrobe. It is not so much about WHAT you use your creativity for. It is about how you USE it. So if you feel depleted, dry, with no creative juices flowing – that’s a big sign that your feminine energy is cut off.

At least the aspect which allows you to create.

And no, it is not permanent damage, but it can do some damage to you if you feel out of your creativity for a long. Most likely – you’ll get depressed and demotivated. So as a woman – remember, you MUST create to be healthy. Create anything. But do create!

So as a woman – remember, you must create to be healthy.

3. You feel cut off from inner knowing.

Have you heard of the phrase “women’s wisdom”? Why do you think this phrase even exists? Also, there is a known phenomenon as a “wise woman”. And if we go further, we would find that there’s “body’s wisdom. While all of the wisdom, including the body’s wisdom, applies to all people, we women have a specific connection to it. Since we have the responsibility and privilege to carry the babies in our wombs, we are also given a specific advantage to be more in tune with “the fields”. I call them physical fields. That is our physical environment, 

including the energetic aspect of it. 

Also, the “field” of knowledge is attached to the physical plane. You can imagine it as collective consciousness or information in which “the knowing” is before “the seeing”. 

As women, we have access to this wisdom, to this energetic and body connection to the knowing.

We can train and learn to be more attuned to this. However, as women, we have access to this wisdom,

to this energetic and body connection to the knowing. Which might feel like, “I don’t know why I know this, but I know”. Or “I don’t know why exactly I need to wait, but I know it is the right thing to do”. So it helps us navigate this field in an aligned way. So if you’re feeling lost, confused, and cut off from knowing, it can be a sign that your feminine energy is currently blocked. Most specifically, it is your aspect of femininity where you can attune to those fields of the knowing that is out of balance.

You haven’t lost your inner connection to this. However, something that you do or think is currently interrupting it.

Fall in love with your femininity

4. You're feeling lonely

If you live in western world society, it is granted that at one point or another, you have experienced loneliness or isolation. In eastern cultures, it’s a bit different. People are generally more group and community oriented. In our (western) society, we are more like dots connected with one or a couple of others. We don’t practice extended families and communities here. (SIDE NOTE: And it is a shame because I would love to be part of an amazing intentional community!) So sometimes, with those couple or several connections, even if we have people, we can still feel lonely because of a

lack of depth in the emotional aspect of connection. Again this is true for both men and women. However, as women, we are waaaay more relationship-dependent and emotionally capable. So if we feel chronic loneliness, especially when we have several people in our lives,

it can signify our feminine energy disbalance. For us women, it is very important to be in groups, in communities of women. 

It is important to have a network of women. It doesn’t have to be literal in the physical sense (i.e. living together or nearby) but at least emotional. Of course, there is a physical aspect of gathering that is very healthy for us. However, at minimum, having this connection on an emotional level where we can share, talk, receive and be received is very important. That makes us feel like we belong like we have our “sisters” like we have our women family. So if you constantly feel lonely, it is a sign that this aspect of femininity is suppressed. That deprives you of a sense of having this emotional resource. And having emotional resources is very essential to us.

Having emotional resources is very essential to us, women.

5. You feel like you have to do everything by yourself

We are the designated receivers. Men are the designated givers. Yes – we have both energies in us, and all people must give and receive. However, if we were born in the feminine embodiment, we are more of the Yin energy, which is receptive and passive. Is passivity bad? It is seen as bad in Western cultures especially. However, passivity is absolutely needed to be able to receive. We cannot receive it if we are in the giving mode. So for that, we need to stop and allow ourselves to receive support, receive assistance, receive aid.

And the certain sign that you are not allowing this energy

to come through when you feel responsible for everything. If you feel responsible for everything at home, all the chores, tasks, even for how the relationship goes, your work etc., you are not sharing the space: you are not sharing energetic space with the masculine. You are out of balance with your feminine form and overstretching into a masculine energy and not allowing external masculine energy to assist.

Of course, there is positivity in ownership, which is why people feel they

have to do things themselves. And for women, of course, it is natural to feel this towards our home, our projects, our family, and our babies. However, to be able to be a healthy woman, you need to be able to open some space for sharing the responsibility and sharing the doing. So it doesn’t have to be your partner; it can be another man. Also, it can be other women that do things with you or do things for you. And while there are things that you definitely want to do by yourself (maybe you are very good at painting, drawing, writing or designing something – because it is your thing and you love it), there is never a time when you should have to be doing everything by yourself. And if you don’t have a network like that yet, maybe you should be the one creating it? 😉

And so that goes.

I haven’t met a perfect woman or a perfect man yet. Then again, should we be perfect and ALWAYS stay in our feminine embodiment without fail? Of course not! We are in this life, this reality, this experiential learning, growing and feeling our way in who we are and how we want to be. I personally love the idea of genders, of different embodiments, of the privilege to be able to experience whatever energy form we have incarnated in. And since our society is neither perfect nor very gentle with people who are trying to do things differently and in their own way, we experience this restriction in our energy embodiment. 

I see that sometimes the circumstances, situations, other people, and internal and external pressure forces us into surviving mode. We adapt our strategy to whatever works and doesn’t cause problems. Or at least in the short term. So we don’t necessarily choose to use the energies and ways of being most natural, healthy and supportive of our individual embodiment. We choose to survive.

I'm not interested in surviving only. I'm interested in thriving while living.

However, I’m not interested in surviving only. I’m interested in thriving while living. And we cannot thrive if we try to be something we are not. We cannot thrive in the things that are naturally very hard for us, or we are not equipped for it by design. And because my design (probably yours too) is a woman (since you’re reading this), I see no other way to bring health to our lives than re-own our femininity powerfully. And not in the way THEY or SOMEONE tells us to, in the way that is healthy for US. In the way that it is healthy for YOU.

Love, Ruta

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